


To Be Perfect

by Origin013



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Abuse, Body Shaming, Cutting, Gen, Internalized Homophobia, Kisses, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Harm, Seto is a deprived teen, Top Jounouchi Katsuya | Joey Wheeler, Top Kaiba Seto, Violetshipping, puppyshipping - Freeform, smut in later chapters, tired boys that need hugs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:21:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26902045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Origin013/pseuds/Origin013
Summary: Due to their own reasons Joey and Seto are now forced to go on the school's annual volunteer trip to Chichibu-Tama-Kai National Park, to plant trees. Emotions are high, there’s tension in the air, you can smell it. Well, it’s their story, I’ll let them tell it.
Relationships: Jounouchi Katsuya | Joey Wheeler/Kaiba Seto
Comments: 7
Kudos: 24





	1. Joey POV

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy this shit-fest

**Chapter 1- Joey POV**

As always Joey awoke to the discontinuous hum of his electric fan, to the smell of alcohol and cigarettes, and to the feeling of dread.

He looked at the old clock near his bed, the busted thing was always 15 minutes late, he had to get to school soon or he would be late again. Joey got out of bed wincing as his muscles screamed in agony. He walked over to the cracked full body mirror he had found in an alleyway a mile from his shitty apartment. What stared back at him was truly frightening, he had bruises, some old, some new. Though they were always in the same place, on his chest, over his ribs and covering his stomach, easy to hide; hard to forget. Joey scanned the rest of his disgusting body, faded dirt everywhere, his ribs protruding out, his too weak arms dangling at his sides, and his legs. He had always had long legs, he was always fast. Fast enough to run from bullies from gangs and from his apartment, but never fast enough to run from himself. His long legs were covered in the scars of his mind, the thoughts that never left him found a home on his legs, in the cuts that went there. Finally Joey looked at his face, the features were all sunken from malnourishment, but his eyes were very noticeable, for they were dead. No light no will shone in his eyes, at least not yet. Joey covered his face in his hands and took a deep breath. 

In……..Out……..In…….Out.

And when he took his hands away he saw himself, smiling. Looking happy to be alive and not as badly damaged as he really was. With the fake smile the blonde went to find a clean uniform, quietly though not wanting to attract the attention of the monster down the hall, in case it was still there. After Joey got a uniform and the tattered pieces of paper he used for whatever notes he pretended to take, he looked at himself one more time. No longer seeing the sad boy but instead seeing a happy high school student ready to go to school and see his friends. And with that he quietly left his room carefully looking to see if the monster was still here and it was, passed out on the couch beer bottle littered all over the floor. For a moment Joey just stared at the monster he could rid himself of it once and for all and no one would know, no one would care. He shook his head and made his way silently to the door, he unlocked the many latches on it and swung the door open. Then he heard it the monster was waking up so Joey bolted before it could register what was going on. Joey ran fast, he was good at that, running fast. He ran until he was halfway to school then he slowed down as his abdominal muscles cried and whined in protest to the sudden movements. As the blonde boy continued walking towards his destination he thought of trivial things like new cards to get and different strategies to try. Before he knew it he was at the front gate of the school, and even more surprisingly on time. Joey walked through the school keeping his chin up and his smile bright as he went to his homeroom class. There he saw his friends, his amazing friends that without knowing it have kept him alive.

“Hey guys!” Joey said, lifting his hand and waving. They all looked over Yugi, Tristan, Duke, and Tea seeing him coming up. Well what they saw was a happy young boy without a care in the world going to school with his friends, school being the jail and home being freedom not the other way around. He walks up to his friends, Yugi offers a high five while Tristan slaps his back-hitting a bruise- Joey stumbles but grins through the pain.

“Hey Joey” Yugi said with his normal cheeriness, “How was your weekend?”

Joey ignored the fact that he spent most of the weekend scared and shaking either in his room or in his special place, not a lot of work got done but he tried his best. So in the end he grinned and swung his left hand behind his head.

“Same old same old” Joey replied, “trying to sleep and avoid my old man.” Tea just sighed and went on a rant about how important it was to do your homework and to try your hardest. The only problem is he is trying his best, trying to run, trying to hide and trying to pretend, there was no time for real work. Instead of saying the things that were going through his head he just waved his hand in Tea’s face,

“Yeah yeah… I get it. I’ll try harder _**mom**_.” Joey said with a self-satisfied smirk, ducking quickly to avoid the hand that came up to slap him. Joey pranced away from his angry friend while the rest of the crew laughed at their childish antics, then he fell. Joey in his haste, wasn’t looking behind him and tripped over a perfectly tailored black Italian leather shoe, which was connected to a very long leg shrouded in perfectly ironed black dress pants, which was connected to a very lanky midriff covered in the navy blue of the school uniform, which was connected to the very pissed off face of one Seto Kaiba. Joey, for a moment, didn’t move just looked at Kaiba’s face, his expression of anger and concern but not for Joey, for his very new and very expensive shoes. Then Kaiba scuffed and all but kicked Joey out of his way,

“Really mutt, someone really should train you better.” Kaiba said looking down at Joey with a sneer. Joey shot up as he felt his cheeks heat up from embarrassment, though the shame was quickly replaced by his signature rage.

“ I already told you dickhead, I ain't a dog, and maybe you should be looking where you're going instead of having your head shoved up your ass and blamin’ me.” Joey said glaring at the taller boy.

 _Damn why he is so tall_.

Yugi quickly got between the two duelists, though with his lack of height he wasn’t immediately noticed. Tristan put his hand on Joey’s tense shoulder trying to break up the fight before it began,

“Come on man, leave it, don’t start off the week with a trip to the principal's office. Let it go.” Tristan said trying to calm the ticking blonde time bomb before it blew. Joey keeping his eyes locked with Kaiba’s backed off slightly, with that Kaiba smirked and shoved past Joey and the rest of his friends into the school. Joey grit his teeth wanting nothing more than to run after that pompous shithead and cave his head in, but Tristan was right, and to be honest he was too fragile to start another fight. Joey just fake grinned again and turned to his friends sheepishly,

“Sorry about that, he really just gets me goin’.” he said rubbing a hand through his disheveled hair.

“It’s alright Joey let’s just go to class.” Yugi replied, eager to get into the homeroom on time. Everyone else agreed with murmurs and head nods, and so the group went to their homeroom, the only class they all had together. As they walked Joey took up the rear, thinking about his latest skirmish to add to his list. In all honesty almost all of his fights now were with Kaiba, and Joey didn’t know why Kaiba bothered. Did Kaiba find him entertaining? That made no sense considering that Kaiba could get the world to bend down for a source of amusement, rich fucker. Kaiba could have anything, so why did he bother Joey. Kaiba was free, he had no monsters, he had no spiders, he didn’t have legs that ran in place from death itself. Kaiba had his little brother somewhere safe and with him. And yet he wanted to bully Joey, to show of all the perfect things Joey will never have.

_Why are you so perfect compared to me?_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this shit fest

**Chapter 2- Kaiba POV**

As always Kaiba awoke to the balanced thrum of the fan in his laptop, to the smell of expensive whisky and vomit, and to the feeling of dread. He slowly sat up so as to not aggravate his throbbing head, he sustained quite the migraine the previous night going through emails from the finance team on his latest merchandise release. The total income that the company earned from this launch was starting to not be worth the headache and the lost hours of sleep. He looked at his clock, and as always the blue digital numbers blared out at Kaiba, searing his tired eyes with the numbers 8:00 he had to be up and ready in 20 minutes tops in order to get to school on time. It always boggled his younger brother that he could get up at the same time everyday at the same time without an alarm of any kind, but Mokuba always slept well in the manor; Kaiba never did. The slender boy walked over to the full body mirror next to the walk-in-closet, two things that Mokuba made him get for ‘aesthetic’. Kaiba looked up at the mirror and what stared back was truly frightening, his legs were pale, so...so pale, they could have belonged to a corpse. Looking up he saw old scars littering his chest and a few crawling around just into view from his back. Looking higher he didn’t see a person but rather a creature, a pale beast that couldn’t be normal, not once could it be normal! There was a sickness in him that spread from his heart to the rest of his cursed body to his brain, wreaking him in the most painful way possible. Kaiba recalled a conversation he heard in the previous weekend, the snakes had crawled up the hall late on Saturday, grumpy that they had been called in on a weekend,

“.... I can’t believe that faggot made us come in during the weekend. I have better shit to do with my time than kiss his ass.” One man said that Kaiba identified as his Senior VP of finance. Another man responded some glorified secretary

“I know I swear to you his is a Flammer, he probably was a glory hole for Gozaburo, that's why he’s the CEO now.” 

The men laughed, and most of the time Kaiba would have bust in and fired them all but instead he turned and ran to the nearest bathroom and hurled the little food he had eaten during the day. Kaiba had wiped his mouth with the back of his hand while he gasped for breath, the words ringing in his head, never leaving and never being quiet. The CEO stood up and looked in the bathroom mirror, but then the background changed. Kaiba was back in his room in the manor looking at the body length mirror next to the closet. Kaiba was breathing heavily, the memory of the past weekend and older ones haunting his conscious mind until Seto covered his face with his hands and took a deep breath. In… Out… In… Out… Taking his hands away from his face, he no longer saw the terrified corpse that was staring back at him moments ago, but rather the stone cold CEO of the most successful company in the world. His eyes were no longer sad but guarded and awake, ready for anyone who would try to take his title away from him. Kaiba turned away from his mirror image and got changed into his own strange combination of a suit and the school uniform as always. He wore perfectly ironed black dress pants, his new Italian leather shoes and the navy blue school uniform jacket. The jacket was smooth and clean, not a thread out of place, as it should be. With that Kaiba quietly left his room and went down the stairs to the foyer, where Roland was waiting for him with his usual briefcase that held his laptop and current important papers, in his usual pressed suit and tie. Kaiba extended his arm and held out his hand for his briefcase, Roland hesitantly handed it over.

“Mr. Kaiba, what about Moku-” Kaiba cut him off with a simple glare, not ready to have his decisions judged. 

“He’s classes don’t start for another hour so he can sleep in, but do wake him up so he has time to get ready.”

“ Of course Mr. Kaiba.” Roland said looking away from his boss, but Kiaba knew that under those glasses and the stone cold face was a man trying to be a father to boys who never knew parental guidance. Roland just turned and opened one on the double mahogany doors, stepped out and widened the door for the young CEO to walk out. He walked out and into the open car door of his classic limo, he sat down in the perfectly crafted navy blue leather seats, he put his briefcase on the seat next to him and simply looked up and stared at the divider that separated the coach from the driver's seat. The car started with the quiet hum of perfectly oiled machinery, as the world went past the oldest Kaiba, he contemplated how fast his thoughts were. He could go at the speed of sound in a custom made jet but he couldn’t go faster then his thoughts. Those thoughts, starting small and growing into massive tendrils of shame that made him want to crawl in bed and never come back, though to be honest he didn’t want to kill himself, he just wanted to go away and come back when it all got better. For just a moment Kaiba let himself slip, sighing as he pressed himself into his chair as if trying to be swallowed by it. He lost track of time and soon enough the limo halted in front of the metal gate of the school and beyond that was a sea of teenagers. 

_ God fucking dammit _

Kaiba thought, not looking forward to warding through the crowd of sweaty children all trying to get his attention. After the panic settled a bit, Kaiba collected himself, grabbed his briefcase and got out of the car with the grace and finesse a CEO should have. He straightened his uniform and walked a few steps almost to the gate through the gates trying to ignore the eyes that followed him. On the outside people would have thought the attention was like a pesky mosquito that the CEO saw as nothing, when in reality the eyes and the whispers drove Kaiba insane, he wanted to know what they said, had to know! The tendrils came back, they spoke as well,

_ They are speaking about you, they know…. They will all know.  _

Kaiba wanted to shake his head but refused to show any weakness, instead he walked ahead schooling his expression into a cold mask……...then something hit him. More specifically a uniform covered leg tripped over his new shoes, that rumpled uniform leg was connected to a strong torso shown only slightly by the hiked up dirty white shirt. That messy uniform was connected to one Joey Wheeler with his mop of blonde, tangled hair. Joey had shut his eyes on impact and he opened them and slowly Joey’s eyes ran up his body till he saw who he tripped over. 

_ Wait when has it been Joey?  _

In response to his emotional conundrum Kaiba scowled at his own lapse in self control and the blonde nuisance at his feet, 

_ Just like a good dog,  _ that thought made him grin a wicked grin.

“Really mutt, someone really should train you better.” Kaiba sneered, he watched the boy under him go from embarrassed to enraged.

_ There we go. _

Kaiba loved riling up the mutt he doesn't know why but it gave him some sick joy, not pure joy because that doesn’t exist in Kaiba; it does in others. The thought soured his somewhat good mood.

“ I already told you dickhead,” the blonde snarled-quite dog like “I ain't a dog, and maybe you should be looking where you're going instead of having your head shoved up your ass and blamin’ me.” Kaiba glared down at the smaller boy, though not much smaller, but Kaiba knew that the mutt despised their slight height difference. Kaiba took every opportunity to make the other boy feel smaller, weaker- and yet it only seemed to make him stronger and more willing to fight. 

_ Why didn’t he crack, why didn’t he fold? _

His revelation made him block everything out including Yugi trying to break up the fight before it began, though the small boy didn’t do much. Though the other spiky haired boy, what was his name.... Oh Tristan. Yes Tristan grabbed Wheeler’s shoulder “Come on man, leave it, don’t start off the week with a trip to the principal's office. Let it go.” he said, trying to calm down his angry friend. Kaiba watched the exchange with mock amusement, internally wondering why he was so saddened by the exchange. Nevertheless Wheeler, keeping eye contact with him, stepped away- Kaiba resisted the urge to say good dog- instead he smirked and shoved past the ticking blonde time bomb, going to his homeroom. 

As Kaiba continued walking his smirk faded , his expression going back to his normal cold and schooled façade. He walked through the halls, people giving him a wide berth as he went through the school, his mind however was still lingering on his most recent exchange with Wheeler. Why didn’t Joey ever cave, not like early but like how he himself did? Shutting down at the idea of not living up to the perfect vision of what he is meant to be. Whenever the other boy was criticized he didn’t need to fake anger and drive, it came naturally; not that the blonde menace had any sort of expectations of himself. Joey was free, he had no cold dark halls, he had no expectations, he had no resentment in his eyes, instead there was life. Joey had friends that wanted to be around him just for him as a person. Why couldn’t Wheeler just have one flaw, one thing for Kaiba to truly harass him about, and one thing to make him human.

_ Why are you so perfect compared to me? _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.tumblr.com/blog/blue-daisies-and-pink-roses


	3. Chapter 3

Joey continues to go through the motions, smile, laugh, snatch food from his friends, all in an attempt to seem happy. Yugi and the others didn’t know any better, and he wanted to keep his friends in the dark, no one should have to deal with spiders, not even Kaiba. That last thought caused Joey to pause in the process of lifting some of Tea’s chips into his mouth.

_ Why didn’t Kaiba deserve spiders? _

Kaiba had everything, at the least he should have one thing that kept him up at night, it’s not fair. So yes, Kaiba did deserve spiders, but still the idea of the young CEO having spiders crawl through his bed at night made Joey sick.

“.... -ello, Joey? Hey man are you listening?” a voice cut through his thoughts and brought him back to the present. He turned his head and looked at Tristan and the rest of his friends, who were looking at him strangely, for a moment the blonde boy panicked before calming himself and giving them his best bashful grin.

“Yeah sorry about that. I stayed up late last night or rather this morning working on my deck.” Joey said, his response got mixed reviews. Tristan and Duke snickered behind their hands, Tea looked at him disapprovingly and Yugi just gave him a knowing smile, since he was doing the same thing the previous night. Then Tea in her normal mother hen mode, started lecturing him about how important sleep was for the developing body, especially on a Monday. Joey just tuned her out,trying to instead focus on what was going on for the rest of the day. Apparently they were going to have an assembly after lunch just for seniors, it was supposed to be about some annual volunteer trip to some random national park to do god knows what. Hopefully it ran long, he had no intention of going to his European history class if he could avoid it. 

Soon the bell rang and the teachers corralled them into the gym like some kind of cattle. Joey sat with his friends, and as usual the teacher said they were waiting for everyone to arrive, and by everyone they meant Kaiba. He honestly didn’t know why they bothered Kaiba never came to assemblies, why would he suddenly start now, entitled prick. The blonde boy shook his head slightly trying to get Kaiba out of his head, to no avail. He couldn’t stop thinking about why Kaiba bothered him, the CEO would laugh, judge, and criticize and yet Joey couldn’t see him with spiders...how strange. Before Joey could dwell on it further, the assistant principal walked forward and redirected their attention to the other educators. 

“Good afternoon, boys and girls.” the assistant principal said raising her hand “ Today we are here to talk to you about an upcoming trip to Chichibu-Tama-Kai National Park. As a class of seniors you will go and give back to the communities that need it most. We leave this Tuesday and will stay there till Thursday, since this is a school sponsored event there is no price, also your parents have already been notified. Don’t worry they were told to keep it a secret and to just let us know if they didn't want you to go. One more thing, it is optional for most of you, if you haven’t gotten your volunteer credit this is your last chance to do so. Remember you must have one volunteer credit to graduate…” Joey let his mind wonder after that, he had already gotten his points last year on a trip to Akiu Great Falls, where they cleaned trash out of the riverbanks, so he didn’t need to go or listen to the rest of the droning voice of the assistant principal.

_ Maybe I can work more hours at Matsuya, or actually get some work done.  _

As Joey contemplated what he could do with his extra time they were all dismissed from the gym and went to their final period of the day; for Joey that was Literature Comprehension, in building 3. Joey waved to his friends going into the other direction, keeping his smile bright he walked into his last classroom and sit down only for the teacher to look up at him and point to the door,

“Mr. Wheeler, your presence is requested in room 1003.”

This surprised Joey, room 1003 was the student counselors office, he hadn’t been sent there since his first year of high school. The other students in the room turned to look at him, some had blank expressions others snickered behind transparent hands while others didn’t even bother turning their heads. 

Joey nodded, stood and left the classroom, making his way to building 1, and to the counselors office. As he went he started to hear his heart beating in his ears, Joey was terrified. Did he do something? Was he in trouble? Did Serenity do something? Is she okay?

_ Oh God, is she okay?  _

Joey, robotically, knocked on the metal door of room 1003

“Come in.” the familiar voice of Mrs.Tanaka, the student counsellor, from inside. Joey tried to calm his racing heart to no avail before opening the door to see a kind smile.

“Joey good to see you again, now don’t worry you’re not in trouble” Mrs. Tanaka said her eyes crinkling around the edges of them as she smiled, “ I wanted to talk to you about the next volunteer trip.” 

Joey walked in, closed the door behind him, and sat down across from the smiling women. Mrs.Tanaka was an older woman with black hair that had grey streaks in it, though she was older her eyes were as young as ever. Her eyes were a pretty blue, not Kaiba’s cobalt blue but rather a paler shade. Joey straightened in his chair, again Kaiba had invaded his thought uncalled for, and in an almost positive way… strange. Mrs. Tanaka commanded his attention again,

“As I’m sure you have heard about the volunteer trip for our seniors, to Chichibu-Tama-Kai National Park, to plant trees.” Joey raised a brow

“Ah, yes.” he said 

“And I know that you already have your volunteer credit but, for students like you the trip can also count as extra credit in one subject of your choosing.”

“Um… alright, but I don’t need extra credit.”

“Well you might.” Mrs. Tanaka said, she pulled out a piece of paper with his grades on it, “ You see your math grade is lacking just a little bit, if you go on this trip it can bring you up enough to pass the class for this quarter, which you need to do in order to graduate from the school in a few months.” After her long winded explanation, Joey slumped in his seat slightly, he had been looking forward to his added self time that he was going to get. 

“I understand that this might throw a wrench in your plans, but you need this,” Mrs Tanaka said clearly sympathetic, “This trip will do you so much good.”

“ No, I get it Miss. I guess I’ll pack my bags” Joey said plastering on his fake smile, hoping it would fool her.

“Thank you Joey, you will have fun I promise.”

“Alright, I better go to class now.” 

“Good luck, Joey.” Mrs. Tanaka said with a wave of her hand and another glint in her eye. As Joey left the now constricting office he tried to think happy thoughts to just get that fake smile back on his face, but he couldn’t. The blonde covered his face and took a breath in… out… in… out. When his hands fell to his side Joey was smiling and happy, cheerful smile. A relieved smile, one that screamed joy and satisfaction in life.

_ How pathetic.  _

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!!  
> Love you!!   
> @blue-daisies-and-pink-roses on tumblr


End file.
